Announcer: The views an opinions expressed in Listening are those of the hos of the program and its guests.

They do not necessaril reflect the views or opinions of WGTE Public Media.

Keith: How do we find purpose in our lives?

How do we define purpose?

One could argue, as poets, philosophers, and prophets have since the time of the Romans and Greeks, that this pursuit purpose is what makes us human.

As Thomas Merton put it, ask me not where I live or what I like to eat, but ask me what I am living for.

Some live for duty to God, to country, to both, or for family, for work or certain ideals, or for happiness.

The Dalai Lama has said that the purpose of life is to be happy.

We ask a group o people what purpose is to them, how they find it.

Tom Seaman was raised in Toledo, and the projects in his formative years.

Tom was saved by his own ambition and by Saint Francis de Sales High School.

He went on to become a highly successful businessman, then a philanthropist, and now an author, wanting a better and higher purpose.

I mean, we're, we're in the projects here in Toledo where you grew up.

Tom: Yes.

This unit right here, unit 13, just one third of this building is where we lived.

And I think we lived here until my mother had nine children.

She eventually had 12.

So there were ten people in this little part of this building.

Unbelievably tight.

Yeah.

So I guess my first thought about my sense of purpose were, you know, I concluded when I was a young kid that I wanted to be either the heavyweight champion of the world, like Muhammad Ali, who I thought was an interesting guy, or the president of the United States, or the richest guy in the world, so I could buy all the popsicles.

When a kid had knocked the popsicle out of my hand, you know?

So I had these kinds of dreams of very high achievement from a young age.

Purpose, really I think early in life was based more in religion because I was raised fairly Catholic, you know, by a quite Catholic mother, and had a lot of exposure to nuns and priests.

So I think that's where I would walk the streets at night and ask, why did God make me?

Why are we here?

These sorts of big existential questions, which I honestly thought about at a very young age.

Keith: So is that, how you got to Saint Francis?

Do you think you would have turned out sort of the same sort of person without Saint Francis?

TOm: I think that Saint Francis played a huge role in it because of the people I hung around with at Saint Francis.

You know, before I got to Saint Francis, I was hanging around with some guys in the neighborhood, and we were starting to do some things that, you know, if you got caught, we'd be considered crimes, you know?

Yeah.

Throwing pumpkins onto a highway on top of cars or or a minor stealing or you know, certainly vandalism.

And, so when I arrived at Saint Francis, I started hanging around with a whole different, different kind of kid.

You know, and who were thinking about big thoughts about politics.

And they were reading and they were, you know, religion and these questions.

And so I think Saint Francis definitely helped me define my purpose better.

And also, I think, got me more on the straight and narrow without even realizing they were doing it.

It was just by the kids I was hanging around with.

So I decided that I would try to do an act of kindness every day for a stranger, ideally for a stranger.

But if not, I get home at night and do it at home and, sometimes this act of kindness can be something very large, like giving a huge scholarship to Saint Francis.

Right?

That's the kindness for that day.

But the next day, it might just be something small.

And one of the things you find when you do this is that it actually makes you a happier person to.

Keith: Thats quite a story.

Tom: Yeah, yeah, the times were interesting.

Times for sure.

Keith: Well thank you for talking with us.

Tom: All right, Keith, thank you.

Keith: Father.

Ron Olszewski.

Father.

O.

To most people, is the longtime principal headmaster and president of Saint Francis.

To Sales, a Catholic school for boys.

Now semi-retired he continues to teach religion at Saint Francis and also does weekend parish work.

Though he has a PhD.

Father O communicates with high school boys in a simple, honest and direct way.

He never condescends.

Is not abstract.

He preaches in the same way.

He is indeed a master communicator and a priest.

Priest.

He has spent his entire adult life teaching young men how to become Christian children.

This is what you've been doing Your entire adult Life.

Teaching young men how to find their own paths to purposes that affair.

Fathe O: I think that's pretty fair.

We always talk about we take boys.

We try to make them into young Christian gentlemen.

I think they have a yearning for spirituality.

I think they have a desire to be connected to other people.

So I think they want that.

But sometimes they don't know exactly how to do that.

Keith And what's the what's the key?

Father O We have to get out of ourselves and give ourselves to something bigger.

Whether it's service, a team, a passion for your profession, writing, teaching, whatever it might be.

And then we really find ourselves.

You know, I think if I spent 40 years as a principal or president here and on some of those days, I wa I didn't have any self at all.

It started at 7:00 in the morning and go till 1030 at night, you know, just tied up.

But I think you find who you are too.

I had my students one time.

I set up cell for this tes instead of taking it yourself.

How about if I put you in groups of four?

You work either together, you all get the same grade.

They were reluctant to die first.

They saw this as good, so they divided all the questions up.

It's one that a question.

So the grades are not very good.

So others who were together, they got a very good grade.

And I said what was the difference.

Well because we had to, I had to give up some of my thoughts, listen to other people and, some of my ideas I had to fight for t make sure I got out the paper.

And, I think that that working together was so importan for young people, for all of us.

One article that was in the rotary magazine once, this was two years ago or so they did.

They quoted report a stud some people did in California.

They took the most popular TV shows from the 50s, 60s and the most popular TV shows from 2015 or so, and they took values.

And what were the values shown in these shows?

Back in the 50s, it was community, you know, self was at the bottom and self was so much at the top for so many people now.

I mean, it's clear you read articles and the narcissism scale has gone up.

So many people are so concerned about themselves and that's not healthy.

You know you have to get out of yourself.

Keith: It doesn't seem to make people happy.

Father O: No no it doesn't.

No, not at all.

Yeah.

Keith: And do you find that the students that you've taught here for so many years, that they can hold on to this sense of service and purpose once they have graduated, move into, quote, the world?

Father O: I think a lot of them do.

I mean, a host of our graduates are very giving and philanthropic towards us.

But a lot of them, too, they're very involved in their communities, philanthropic in their communities, but also involved involved actually doing things.

Bryce Roberts is a therapist with a deep background in both Christian theolog and organizational psychology.

So, let's talk about purpose.

It's part of what you do professionally.

And you you have both a clinical background and a kind, a spiritual background.

Is that a fai share?

Bryce: Yeah.

Keith: Okay.

So how d you navigate that with people?

How do you walk with people through that search?

Bryce: That's a good question.

One of the first things that comes to mind for me with a question like that is existential psychology.

People can bear with anything if they have a deeper sense of why.

Why am I here?

Why am I engaging in this struggle?

What do I want like deeply out of my life?

And for that school of though often that is a like you have to will that you have to muster that in yourself and find it.

And that's what the language of purpose comes up for me when I think of how we make sense out of our life.

How do we make meaning out of this experience?

And that can be, you know, often we talk about people's passions and what lights them up.

You know what?

And I've found in my life and personally in my life, and also working with others, tha that's not always so accessible.

And so I'm, I'm engaged with that.

I like that perspective.

But if that's not accessible to someone, there's also this conversation around needs like where do I fee the most needy and that cannot like I feel a need for greater, rest or greater, relationships or belonging or sense of contentment or something.

And those needs can sometimes draw us in to, to this deeper part of these deeper parts of ourselves where we may find that sense of meaning.

So what the existential schoo of thought says is where goes?

Meaning that I don't hav a sense of meaning in my life.

I haven't figured out how to make meaning of it.

If that goes, what comes in then are mental health symptoms.

I feel down.

I feel anxious if something feels off within me.

It's out of alignment.

Incongruent.

So Rogers will talk about, and s this idea of purpose and making meaning out of our life meaning and purpose.

It's not just cute.

Like, it's not just a exercise to go through or something, but when we can align and feel that greater congruence within ourselves, we we feel healthier.

And we often create things in the world that are help, support and lift up the common good.

You become healthy by promoting health.

Yes.

Yeah.

You.

It's not just an inner experience, but that inner alignment sor of leads to outward creativity.

Keith: And you talk about faith with, with patients and clients or you wait for them to sort of bring it to the table.

Bryce: I would if they want to discuss that, I would bring that.

I would welcome that.

But it's not a priority of mine to bring faith into the conversation.

It's not in a clinical setting.

Yeah, but it' welcomed in a clinical setting.

But if they want that or not.

Keith: Okay.

Well thank you.

Toledo Streets is a unique combination of activism, service and fraternity.

It produces a local street newspaper, which is both partially written and sold on the street by vendors who use the money to help raise themselves up economically and psychologically.

It is an empowerment community and an enterprise for people who have had some bad luck and perhaps made some poor decisions, bu intend to transform their lives.

We spoke with Val Vetter, the former executive director.

Val: Toledo Street started in 20, 2009.

And we serve as a workforce development program that helps those who are facing homelessness or those who are, seeking poverty, have an avenu to create income for themselves to become financially and domestically autonomous.

And so we see a lot of people come through our doors, we have been a stapl in this community for 15 years, and we provide a spac of community fellowship and, and a way for certain individuals to advance themselves where they might no traditionally be able to do so.

Keith: So you, you create work for people, you create community.

That seems very evident here.

Val: Yeah.

Keith: And, and you produce a newspaper.

Val: We do.

We produc a monthly news.

Pretty good one.

Thank you.

Thank you Yeah, we're very proud of that.

We have a team of volunteer that actually get that produced every single month.

Keith: So what are you giving your colleagues and clients here?

What?

What are you doing for their lives?

Val: So, as you can see, this is a place to gather.

Many of our vendors, come from other cities, other states, and don't necessarily have a support system around them.

So we are able to provide them with not only a avenue for income, but also a family, a place where they can come, where they know that we always have our door open, and if anything is going on, we'll be able to welcome them and figure out what steps need to be taken.

We're a conduit to other human, social services.

So if housing is and if, any sort of, you know, drug or alcohol rehabilitation is needed, we are able to make those connections for them.

So we kind of serve as sort of a central hub, but we look at it more as this is our family, this is what we do.

We have a meal every week.

We get together and, provide that sort of safety place for these individuals to be able to come.

Keith: Thank you.

Val: Awesome.

Keith: Ben Stalets began as a volunteer and is now a staff member of Toledo Streets.

Ben: Toledo Streets Newspapers workforce development.

So the main mission behind i is to provide a no holds barred, workforce experienc to people experiencing poverty, homelessness, stuff like that.

But, it's more than that.

It's a community.

And we provide people with, say, a normal job provides second or third chance.

We provide like a sixth or seventh chance.

And so, people come here and they can let off some steam they can vent, they can laugh.

There's no red tape around it.

So.

So anybody can come in if they don't have a birth certificate, if they have an extensive criminal record, it doesn't matter.

They can come in and they can get a jo as long as they're not drinking.

In the office and not drinking on the job, that's all that it really that's all that it comes down to.

Keith: Okay there's an end product to write.

The job is selling the papers, but also writing the papers, telling their stories.

Ben: Yep.

It's, it's they're creating their own product and also their own micro business.

And in the process we're hoping that we teach them a few thing about what it's like to work in, other jobs.

Just the workforce in general.

Yeah, yeah.

Keith: So how did you come to it?

What's your story?

Ben: So about three years ago, I came to it.

I was volunteering here, and, so they asked me to, just work more hour and they'd give me a little bit of money, and I said, no, thank you.

I don't want to ruin this special thing that I've got going with you guys.

And, after I finally saw that they needed me, I started working.

Keith And when you say it was special, you didn't want to ruin it.

What was special about it for you?

Like, what did it do for you personally before you were kind of helping to run things?

Ben: Well, I was able to just come i and it felt like I was hanging out with them.

I felt like I was one of the vendors, like, I just felt like they were just like a group of friends.

And I didn't really want to ruin that dynamic.

And I felt good about what I was doing with my time.

You know, like, I'll walk down the street with my dog, a few days of the week to go check on vendors or whatever.

And, I'm like, I cannot believe I'm getting paid for this.

I love talking to these people.

They're just like, you know, really interesting, but normal people.

Keith: Yeah, yeah.

So what prepared you to do this kind of work?

I don't know.

Ben: I have, I have anxiety sometimes, and, it feels like in, like, tense situations at this job.

It's like.

So it's like when my anxiety finally makes sense, like I'm able to, like intense situations when I'm, like, breaking up disputes that are happening outside, I'm able to, really be levelheaded.

And, it feels like I'm really able to be present and arrive for the situation.

It wasn't hard to understand that these people are just, the same people as everyone else except for, they might not have as good of a support system at home.

And so they're just.

We've all made the same bad mistakes.

Like, they might not even have as bad of a criminal record as as I do.

But they, just didn't have the support that most, most people do.

Keith: So this is feeding you in some way?

Ben: Absolutely.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Keith: And you're, you're not a social worker or anything like that by training or trade.

You're a musician.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Well, thank you so much.

Better.

Ben: Yeah.

Absolutely.

Thanks for doing this.

Keith: Linda is a long time vendor for Toledo Streets.

We met her at her workplace.

Linda: Brand new issue with my comic in Stay Focused, page nine of lead.

Thank you.

Keith: So, Linda, you're th top seller for Toledo Streets.

Linda: Correct.

Keith: And for a long time.

Linda: Yes.

Keith: Why is that?

Linda: Because I work very hard.

Keith: Are you usually on this spot?

Linda: No, I go several places.

Keith: Oh.

You do?

Linda: I only go here on Thursday.

Keith: And how long you been doing this?

Linda: 2009.

14 years.

Keith: Oh, wow.

And what do you like about it?

Linda Meeting a whole bunch of people.

And I got to make money.

It's my job.

I might as well do something that I'm good at.

Keith: Yeah.

What do you think about the whole enterprise of Toledo Streets?

Linda: Overall, it's great a you can be your own boss if you if you're not feeling well, then you can take the day off if it's not a very good spot.

But if it's a good spot, you better be there or somebody will take it away from you.

Keith: Gotcha, gotcha.

And you write for Toledo Streets and do a comic as well.

Linda: I just do a comic I've written a few things that, just maybe 1 or 2 things got published, but my comic always does.

This is Harold.

Keith: Yeah.

Yeah.

Linda: This is Harold Harris.

He's my friend.

And this picture was for the calendar, and, it was this other vendor.

He's not around anymore, but he's a nice man to, He took this picture so I took a picture of Harold, and I put it over that, and that's transportation and says, all aboard.

Keith: This is.

Nice, nice.

So is this the best spot of all your different spots?

Linda: No.

Keith: Oh.

What's the best one?

Linda: The market.

Keith: The market.

That makes sense.

Okay, well thank you.

Linda: You're welcome.

Keith: It's a pleasure.

We spoke with two students from Saint Francis about their hopes, dreams and sense of purpose.

Tell us about your enterprise and what you're involved in.

It's pretty interesting.

Khyerre: I'm involved in a couple, you know, programs, Afroclub, Interaction Clu and then also the Program Inc.

The Program Inc is a program where fatherless kids or fatherless children com to come together in being one.

This that program has taught me how to be more responsible, more respectfu and to be a businessman myself.

And when I'm going to college for social work.

So I will be helping children or, teenagers my age is or anybody who needs help because that's my passion, i to make people's lives better.

We are able to help people grow, help fatherless children grow, and, we just want people to be successful.

Keith: And how about you?

What?

What is it about service that attracts you?

What?

What is how does it change you?

Justin: I think it's the purpose of my life, you know?

I mean, we get up every day and think about what we need first, and we have to do that.

But I, I think life is supposed to be so much more exciting than that.

You know, about giving to others and then, you know, they pay it for.

So, I mean, service attracts me because I'm where I am because people have served me and there's nothing more exciting to me than bringin others to a place like that, to.

Keith: This sort of pulls you out of your, your daily existence.

Justin: Absolutely.

I mean, I find the days where I' the most sad is or I'm isolated from other people or, you know, I' I'm just thinking about myself, you know, thinking about the the next minute or whatever or overwhelmed by what's happening two years from now.

But the days where I'm happiest, I'm I'm lost, you know, I'm lost and serving others.

I'm with all these other people.

I couldn't car how much honor I'm getting or, you know, what the weather's like or anything like that.

That' what service does to a person.

Keith: Well, thank yo both so much for talking to us.

Justin: Thank you sir.

Khyerre Thank you for interviewing us.

Thank you.

Keith: Thank you.

Take care, take care.

Keith: Something Father O said stuck with me.

We'll give him the last word.

Father O: Do you know Father Jonathan White?

Keith: No.

Fathe O: So he's in Port Clinton now?

He was a Christ the King.

That's when I first met him.

But he taught here for a few years.

I went to his 25th anniversary mass.

He gave this homily, and he said, you know I got a lot of cards, thank you.

And he said some people asked me if you knew then what you know now about this life, what?

You have done it.

He says, oh, no, no, you ca see face is dropping a church.

And he said but isn't this true of you, too?

If you knew what marriage was going to involve in raising these kids, would you have done it?

No, he said, so we make a commitment to someone, to something.

After we live out that commitment, we find out who we are.

We find ourselves.

And I think that's very true.

I think it's very true.

I think that's an important lesson for young people to learn.

Keith: John Henry Newman wrote, God has created me to do him some definite service.

He has committed some work to me whic he has not committed to another.

I am a link in a chain, a bond of connection between persons.

All of the people you have met on this program are links in that chain.

All have found antidotes to th prisons of anxiety and the ego.

The common theme service, purpose through service.

And so some measure of happiness.

Announcer: The views and opinions expressed in Listening are those of the hos of the program and its guests.

They do not necessaril reflect the views or opinions of public media.

Listening with Keith Burris is supported in part by Stop and Go convenience stores and the Toledo Clinic, also by viewers like you.

Thank you.